Last year when I visited the province, Ipil surprisingly showed up in my hut. As usual, she was full of smiles, full of life,  and full of plans in the future.

She came from a brood of a dozen children – the kindest among her siblings, I must say. Coming from a huge family, she learned to do odd jobs at a young age, aside from cleaning, cooking, laundry, and taking care of her younger siblings. She was pretty smart, with a degree in Civil Engineering. She also possessed incredible talents in arts and crafts, which she cultivated and developed, and paved the way to a successful little business in the province.

Though there was a twist to this story, she was actually sicker than the exterior appearance she was showing.  When I got to talking with her in my hut, I found out that she had lumps all over her body. She actually had me touch some of them. I never thought it was something serious as she seemed fine and full of spirit. She mentioned though that she had been seeing a doctor in Manila, and he recommended a chemo, but she chose against it . I didn’t know exactly what went on in her mind, but I am guessing that she was probably hoping she would get better with the quackery options in the province.

I left the province and I haven’t heard anything about her until December 2008. She was miserable then per my cousin. I suggested to my cousin that it is best if she quit her business of paper making as it might have something to do with her  illness. The paper making uses harsh chemicals to dissolve the abaca bark into liquid, and without proper precaution, it could be harmful to anyone.  Quitting her business was the last thing in her mind because that was her only source of livelihood and besides,  her business was flourishing, and was getting bulk orders from popular malls in Manila. Actually, last November, she still managed to hold a booth in Virac to showcase and sell her products, although she was feeling sicker and sicker then.

Just recently, I received a text from my brother that Ipil had passed away at 34. She left behind a 3 year-old boy and a young husband.  What a terrible loss! Rest in peace Ipil.

And all I have to remember her of is this hand-made bag below that she gave me last June.

Ipil:  Tita B, this is for you.

Me: (surprise) Oh, this is beautiful, thank you. How much do I owe you?

Ipil: Nothing, it is my gift for you.

Me:  Let me see if I can find something for you in my suitcase.

Ipil: No need.

Me: (came back with a white blouse) Here, this is for you.

Ipil:  Thank you

Photo lifted here.

The other day, I forfeited my break so I could mail a package to my nephew in Canada. I promised him that I’d mail a CD of Stephanie Mae, which was the last copy I had, by the way.

I’d like to be the first person to wait outside the door of the post office right before it opens because I only have a 10-minute break to mail a package. Often times though, 3 to 4 people are already waiting before I even get there. One of them is Johnny – the homeless guy.

Johnny is a very nice guy.  He avails of the general delivery option that the PO offers for free for transient, far-flung tourist, and for the homeless.  He comes to the PO to get his mail pretty much at the same time every day. Johnny always has that big smile for me and for everybody. And he gladly offers his spot to me even though he is there first. I don’t usually take him up on his offer unless I am in a hurry, but that day, there were already 4 to 5 people ahead of me, so I was compelled to take it.

While standing in line along with him and the other customers, I smelled a rather strong odor. I knew right away it came from Johnny. He probably hasn’t taken a shower and changed his clothes in a month. I had to face away from him to try to avoid the smell. But I couldn’t get away from it.

It has always been my policy to avoid giving to homeless people unless it is absolutely necessary. If they look capable of doing manual labor like pushing carts, washing dishes in the restaurants, and cleaning bathrooms, I refuse to give money.  Heck, one of my daughters bagged groceries and pushed carts for some time in a grocery store when she was 16 years old weighing barely a 100 pounds.  If she can push carts, why can’t they?

For some reasons, I pondered on Johnny a lot that morning. He could really use some toiletries and non-perishable food. I thought I’d buy him those goods at the Dollar Store and have E, the clerk, hand them to him the following morning.

The next morning, E showed up at the break room where I was taking a break and shared with me what transpired between her and Johnny. E made up a story. She told Johnny that a guy who stood next to him in the lobby had a plastic of goodies for him. Johnny wanted to know who the guy was so he could thank him but E felt it was not a good idea to disclose the name so she made up some little white lies that she didn’t know the giver’s name, and that she would thank the person for him the next time he comes at the window.

It says:

It sucks to work really really hard on a rough draft of a paper, only to get it back and realize that I suck at the English language. I mean, seriously, when it comes to something as vague as prepositions, how am I supposed to know when to insert “regarding” in place of the word “of”? And I’ll never understand when to say “whom” instead of “who.” People who can write eloquently, I swear, they operate on a separate brain wave from me.

and mom answers:

I am not very fluent in English but I will take my shot at it because sometimes it takes a Filipino mother to answer your grammar questions.

When a sentence needs a subject, use WHO.

ex: Who will be coming?
I recognized the girl who was wearing red dress.

Whom, however, is an OBJECT PRONOUN. It is used as a direct object, indirect object, and object of the preposition.

ex: Whom did you give the money?- (direct object)
You wrote whom the letter?- (indirect object)
To whom did you give the flowers- (object of the preposition)

Anyway, if you really get confused about/regarding the two words, try this. Rewrite just the part of the sentence that contains who or whom. Instead of using who, use he. Instead of using whom, use him. See which sounds better. If he sounds better, use who otherwise, use whom.

example: The boy (who, whom) I sent the flowers was quite charming. Here, you would use whom, because it is used as indirect object. Indirect object answers questions “to whom” or “for whom.” To whom did i send the flowers?

ex: I gave you a $100. You is the indirect object because it explains to whom the money was given. $100 is the direct object because it explains what was given.

Regarding and of, however, are two different prepositions and should not be confused one from the other.

ex: I have a question regarding the topic.
Any questions regarding the rice crisis in the Philippines?

You wouldn’t say, “I have a question of the topic,” or “Any questions of the rice crisis in the Philippines?” Sounds awkward, right. Try to experiment with words and see which sounds better.

Daddy said, informally, you can say “Any questions about the rice crisis in the Philippines?” but “of” is incorrect preposition to use in those sentences. I think your professor is teaching you the formal way of writing.

Blogger friends, did i miss out anything?

Green Valley Park Sunset

Stephanie Mae – a machinist during the day, and a singer at any other time. She is constructing a laptop board as one of her projects.

Here are my favorite ornaments in no particular order.

my favorite of them all is this one because my daughte made it especially for us.

my fireplace

My dining table
The home-made pink heart-shaped paper with pictures on the wall was also given to us by one of our dear daughters so it will always stay there.

my living room

and please don’t mind my mess on the kitchen counter. I will get to it later as I still have to do some errands and cook dinner. But, I think I may just have to buy sub for dinner as I have laundry clothes to fold and tomorrow is a hard day for me at work.

B, the host, was meticulously carving the turkey.

Home-made jala bread that E bakes only twice a year on special occasion.

I snuck in to get a piece of meat while the host was preoccupied with other matter. Bad!

Before lunch:

As I said earlier, I will fill up more on greens and healthy stuff…which I did.  I skipped the pumpkin pie but I was not able to resist the icecream with caramel topping.

After lunch:

That orange yam dish was exceptionally good. It was cooked with brown sugar, butter, and topped with marshmallows.

You can find the song here, or you can listen to her original music at My Space.
You Are Not There and Poker Face are my favorites.

Recent pictures taken after the show:

She is the one on the left.

Now, I don’t know how to repost your comments. I am truly sorry, but I saved them for my daughter to read.

My husband and I spent the whole day with Lexi at the university for Parents’ Day. We left the house at 8:20 AM in time for 10:30 AM brunch. Lexi requested to bring Mango, our Lovebird pet, to the dorm and a couple of other stuff. I mentioned to our lovebird that he was coming with us and he chirped in agreement as if he understood what I was talking about. As I was getting ready for our trip, my husband hauled everything to the car except Mango. We totally forgot about the bird. Afraid that he might be left behind, he made a series of squawks, which immediately caught our attention. Whoa, such a smart bird!

We arrived at the university on time. We stayed in the dorm, for a little while, including Mango. Mango was a little uptight, probably due to unfamiliar places or maybe the drive up scared him. But he settled down after a while.

We had brunch at a school cafeteria. At first, we were a bit hesitant to eat because you know how school food is from experience. We were wrong! The food turned out to be pretty good with lots of choices from biscuits and white gravy, scrambled egg and salmon (delicious!), ham, roast beef and horseradish sauce, muffins of different flavor, bread, cakes, fresh fruits, fresh juices, and many more–all for $10. And Lexi paid for the three of us under her meal plan, which we paid for in the beginning of the year. She doesn’t usually use up her meal tickets because on some days, she goes home late from work and cafeteria closes by that time. What a waste! Maybe, I will visit her often and take advantage of her unused meal tickets.

Can you tell how hungry I was from the size of my plate?

The next three pictures were taken after our brunch in front of Lexi’s dorm, trying to burn off some calories. I ate a little too much kasi.

Thereafter, we headed off to the mall to do some shopping. Lexi needed a pair of boots and stocking cap in preparation for winter. It gets cold at her school. We also bought some cute blouses on sale for Lexi to wear at work. She works at a department store on part time basis, usually on weekends.

We swung by at Wal-Mart to buy some snacks, water, fruits, and personal stuff for Lexi before we went back to the dorm. She asked me to hem her work pants, which took me about half an hour while my husband took a quick nap.

Then we headed out again for a sushi dinner. We didn’t leave the area until past 6 PM and didn’t arrive home until 8 PM. All together, it was a lovely day, spending quality time with my daughter.

My dear blogger-friends, please help my daughter decide which version of her song entitled “At The Edge” is better. You can listen to it here.

She just put up her latest song, “You’re Not There.” which will be recorded next. Please listen to it and give us your feedback.

It wouldn’t be easy for me to talk about my mom without long sigh, furrowed brow, or occasional tears. Nevertheless, I will be fine. Thanks to Greymom for the tag.

• She only reached second grade as it was during the Japanese occupation in the Philippines when the natives spent most of their time hiding. Japanese were all over the province, cutting heads off if you didn’t give in to their demands. My uncles lost his head when he refused to give his pig.  So, instead of going to school, my mom and her family chose to live in the jungle for as long as the Japanese were around.
• She was a fashionista. Boy, she loved wearing nice dresses. I had never seen her wear pants except when she was doing dirty jobs like fishing in the swamp or tending to our kamote plantation.
• She loved strong perfume. Three years ago, I bought a bottle of Opium perfume as a present and boy, did she love the scent. Every after bath, she would dispense a couple of spray and the whole house would be saturated with fragrance. Whew, too strong!
• She had a beautiful soft voice. I can still vividly remember some of the songs that she often sang to us when we were little. Now I know where my kids inherited their singing voices, and of course, given by God,
• She was an excellent cook. She also made excellent desserts that I regret not taking lessons when I had the chance. Her signature dessert was cassava roll with sweetened coconut flakes inside. It was so good!
• She was a hardworking mother and a survivor. At a young age, she taught me how to survive in this tough and cruel world in her own way. She was at her best when faced with adversities and hardships.
• She loved all her children, grandchildren, and extended family. Truly, she epitomized a woman whose love extended far beyond her own family.
• She was very thoughtful. When I recently went home, she gave me php100 to buy caramelized pili nut to be split between my two daughters. Of course, my daughters were thrilled to receive the pasalubong from their lola even how small or little it was.
• She has an incredible memory. Here I am at 40 something, manifesting some signs of Alzheimer’s yet my mother had maintained her memory until her last breath. Why am I doing wrong? Not fair!

I am tagging K, Elyani, and Zherwin.

Me, my mom, and my daughters playing domino.